Direct Smurf


I turned 30 just a bit ago and have been reassessing life. I don't have any answers yet, but the fact that I'm perpetually single has made me wonder if I need to take more risks and give more guys a chance. I've even been considering doing that online dating stuff. When I looked into it, it's just the same as being at a bar: You don't really know what a guy looks like until the lights come on and you can finally see him face to face, AND you have be patient with all the douchbaggery that distracts you from what you're really after. But I digress...

So, taking more risks was a decision I came to. When my neighbors invited me out to meet their friend, I decided to go along even though I had to work early the next morning. I threw a sweater over my nightgown (hey, taking more risks means going as you are too) and headed to the bar. I spent the evening chatting with the smurf who was ok looking but really smart and terribly motivated. I was pretty impressed to hit it off so well. Consequently I stayed much longer than I should have, and by the time I brought us all home I had about 4 hours to sleep before work. Smurf walked me up to my apt and wanted to see my "library" of books. I do indeed have one and I suppose this was an acceptable segue to getting in the front door. He came in, looked around and started to make small talk. He was sober, and I was a little embarrassed by the fact that all my laundry was hanging out. He turned to look at me and after he mentioned that it was really late he surprised me with, "So, am I going to get laid tonite?" Holy directness, Batman! Thank you for asking, guy with sleeves who I just met in a lesbian bar whilst parading around in my nightgown, but I don't move that fast. It's time to work on your come-on lines.

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